Why I Cut My Hair

Doing Things I Never Thought I Could

 Since January 11, 2014, I've been Doing Things I Never Thought I Could, supporting myself with love. For the next 26 days, I'll be continuing to explore what this looks like for me. Some may be trying a new physical activity. Some may be showing up and being more in the moment, while I may also try connecting with others and myself in a new way.

So Far, Here's What I've Been Up To:

• January 11: Learning How to Rock Climb - check out my post and my vlog
• January 14: 1st Nutrition Appointment with Maggie Christopher, a holistic nutritionist - check out my post and my vlog. While I have transformed 100 pounds, have learned a lot about my food sensitives (gluten, dairy, refined sugar, corn and more), there are still pieces for me to learn. I came to Maggie saying, "here's what I've done, here's where I am and will you help me get to where I want to be?"
• January 18: My 100 Pound Lesson - check out my post and my vlog
• January 17: Massage with Sharon
  While this isn't something I didn't think I do, because the truth is, Sharon and I have been working together for years. I recognized how important it was to find a new way to support and love myself and one of these ways includes allowing my body to be healed and loved. After each massage I come away feeling rejuvenated and grateful.
• January 19: Craft
  When I created my Vision Board for 2014 I added the element of reading handwritten positive intentions (thanks Louise Hay). Each morning I come into my space, say a prayer and select a positive intention for the day. I sensed the importance of carrying these intentions with me in another way. Today, I went to my in-laws house, enjoyed a wonderful conversation and created beautiful mini books with my mother-in-laws amazing craft rooms. Each morning I write down the positive intention, carry it with me and read it throughout the day. This reminds me to stay in the moment and take care of myself.  At the end of each day, I place the piece of paper in a beautiful container and at the end of the year, I plan to spend time in reflection with each beautiful intention.

• January 20: I had a Dentist Appointment and found out I have no cavities (the first in many years). Turns out my teeth are healing too! I also had an Ayurveda appointment where I approached seeing myself and my journey with another layer of holistic awareness. I'm still holding on to this one in my heart and hope to share more when the time is ready.

• January 24: Women of Wellness. Even with the blizzard like weather and recognizing I was trying to use that as an excuse, I attented a newly formed group. Two amazing women were inspired to begin this group after they'd taken a group nutrition course with Maggie Christopher. And while my heart said, "yes" to being a part of this, my head wondered if I could do it. Again, I supported those thoughts, paid attention with awareness, all the while trusting this was the experience I'd been craving. Nervous, elated and honored, I vowed to show up. Self-awareness has allowed me to see how in previous group situations I become aware of the energy others and sometimes use this as an excuse to back down from acknowledging my feelings. I went into this group aware that I might do that, while honoring that the best  choice I can make for me (and the group) is to show up as myself. To be willing to share my story and most importantly to listen, while offering support. To observe the ways others show up, to understand what it is in me that wants to go there and to embrace each moment. This was a huge opportunity for me and as with anything, the more I practice, the more natural it becomes. I'm eager to be a part of a group where self-awareness and an honest approach to living a well-balanced life is appreciated.

• January 25: Hair cut & color - see below!

What's next?

There have been so many beautiful moments and I've taken my time to honor when I wanted to share them, or when I wanted to hold them in my heart for a little longer. What I've come to discover about how I show up in the world is that I am my most honoring when I follow my intuition and speak my truth. This is part of my journey, just as blogging and vlogging are also.

I have so many projects, adventures and appointments on the horizon and am quite thankful to have the energy, love and support to do this. The most important is that as I reach the 45^th day of Doing Things I Never Thought I Could, February 24th, I will spend time in reflection and prepare for the start of my 100 days with The Journey Of Nourishment.

Now to, Why I Cut My Hair

After Rock Climbing and working out on my mini trampoline, my left knee was hurting and I took this as an opportunity to look at other ways to create movement in my life. And while I now have an amazing list of activities to try (thanks friends!) I shifted the focus. Maybe the movement can be a look inward? And truth be told, my best creations and moments of inspiration have more life and fire in the belly when following my intuition. Sure I was bummed about my knee, though I trust there is a reason for this side step and I'm honoring it.

Out of introspection, the ignited passion to cut my hair stepped forward. As my mind went into battle with all the reasons to keep it the way it is, my heart continued to honor what is best for my essential self. You see, I'd come to think of my hair as the "only thing I had going for me." An old pattern, quite black and white actually, realizing that it wasn't the length or style that was truly getting in my way, it was the words, the safety nets. Realizing that just as my body mass once was what I thought I needed to feel safe in the world, my hair now had the same feeling.

Six years ago I began growing out my hair, I wasn't aware of the reasons why, I just wanted to try. As it grew, exhilarating joy came as each day brought forward a new style. Then something happened a few weeks ago, whispers from my heart came forward that I was ready for a change and last Saturday I cut my hair! Courage and vulnerability were requested, I found support by vlogging and as I let the length of my hair fall to the floor at Beau Monde Salon with my amazing stylist and friend, Dulcey. I let the idea of who I thought I needed to be fall away so that I could be the person I am.

With Love, Jan