The Reconnection

Road Trip Reflection

In the dreams of my heart months before, a calling to travel west arose and as the road trip plans began, my quest for vision entered in. As our van, filled with camping gear approached the heart of the mountains I, for the first time, experienced the taken breath at the glimpse of snow covered peaks and between the silent heart beat, an awakening began. 

Under the vast Wyoming skies, in a place where initials signed on a piece of paper indicated we knew this was bear country, the chilled breeze seeped through gaps in the blankets, on a bed filled with air. 

There's more stories to tell, snapshots to share and writing to surround the moments of basking in the warmth of suns' rays, body connected with lush earth, being still near the the flowing water. Though today, the words written here surround one of the most important layers of this trip.

The Then & The Now

Has it been 2 years since we last visited this sacred earth? In a place where the Black Hills played landscape to a new layer of my spiritual awakening. Standing on the cliffs of the Badlands, studying the details of the Crazy Horse Monument and clenched teeth as the scenic chairlift soared above the hills or we drove on the narrow roads of Needles Highway. Near the rocks of Deadwood, dreams of a past so real shook me awake, that I needed my fingers to gently pinch the softness of my arms. The trip in 2012 gently rocked me out of the dream I'd been in the last year, maybe longer and awoke me into honoring the life meant for me.

And so here I am, over 730 days later, far from who I was then, yet even more aware that she is right beside me. She and I, spoke on this trip, maybe not in words shared across a space like a friend. Rather in conversations when the fear of heights found me on top of the Grand Tetons. Or during letters written upon my journals' pages or in the videos made for my GiveIt100.com project on Forgiveness. Though mostly, our conversations were held in the silence of the sun or in the gaze of the horizon. Silent to words and when I settle in, they matter less, the details, it was the intention of our connection. And as she looked through my eyes to see the world and as I listened for her delicate voice, we became reconnected. For it isn't the difference the brings us together, it's the journey we've shared.

And rather than feeling the need to move mountains that lay before me in my journey, trying to overcome something that I see as being in the way. I listen and understand that they are part of it and rather than trudge in with anger or resentment, fear or doubt, that by being still and acknowledging, that I indeed find gratitude for their beauty.

These photos honor moments of my life, times when the me of then and the me of now were in the same place. And while the forms have changed and how we see and interact with the world has transformed, there we are, both dancing delicately with our humanity, hopeful and honoring the essence of our being, understanding that healing is occurring in the sacredness of travel.

With Love, Jan